First of all thank you Jenny, Melissa, Abbie, & Deb for commenting on my last post. It really means a lot that people care. I think it's important to not just care but find ways to show that you care too. Even a silly little comment on a blog can do that. Thank you!I haven't been writing lately cause I've been in this weird funk. My job is entirely to stressful & I've grown to desperately hate it. Unfortunately this negativity is seeping into other areas of my life. I've been wavering between complete apathy & being depressed most of the time. Truth is I probably need my meds adjusted. Don't worry I have an appointment with my doctor on the 15th of this month. Let's hope he & I can figure something out. Since I've been having a ruff go of it lately I just haven't had the desire to write. I don't like being negative & hating everything. I certainly don't think I need to share this attitude with the world so I've started writing in my journal a bit. I've also tried to make a conscious effort to focus on the good things in my life which there are many. I've actually made a list of these good things. Here's a bit of what I've come up with and am calling my "positive thinking" list:
- I have survived the half dozen lay offs my job has done this year & I still have a job.
- Any job is better then no job in this economy.
- I have a place to live.
- I have electricity & water in my place to live.
- I can pay my bills and still have a bit left over to buy a thing or two that I want.
- My car is the SHIT! Rust and all. Gotta love the Geo! It looks like hell, but I own it out right and it just keeps going and going.
- Canon & Daphney make me happy.
- I found a wine that I like. That's actually not entirely true cause Jesse found it for me. I've always wanted to like wine & now I have a favorite, "Wild Vines" strawberry.
- I have one person in my life that I know for certain loves me unconditionally & I never thought that that was possible.
- I'm going to be an Auntie very shortly.
- I finished reading the Torah (only the Five Books of Moses) 2 days ago & I completely understand it.
- Everything I've learned about Judaism I love. It speaks to my soul somehow & I yearn to learn more.
- I am still having new experiences and leaning new things daily. For example I had Indian food for the first time recently & am now a devoted fan. I believe new experiences are an essential part of life.
You have a lot to be thankful Heather. Just try to find something positive everyday in your life, however small. :0)
ReplyDeleteHi Heather! I'm glad you posted a link to your latest blog on Facebook; that way I remember to read it. I'm glad you are being positive. There really is a lot to be thankful for. I love you so much. You are such an inspirational and sweet person. I really need to see you before the year is over.
ReplyDeleteone of the positive things in my life is your blog, so i'm glad you've continued to post. thank you.
ReplyDeleteas far as negativity goes, i think it's fine to be apathetic and/or negative sometimes. as you've shown, it forces you to really be grateful for the gems you do have in your treasure box. i think most of us don't take time to do that...ever... but you have. and i think it's amazing.
and i like your new pic.
ahahaha! i just noticed one of the sites you like is about purses and home decor. and i think to myself, "...of course."
ReplyDeleteawesome.
(i know it's to help support a harri's cause, but i still think it's so classic. and i'm still chuckling)
I like your list. I should make a list for myself. Thanks for the great idea.
ReplyDeleteHeather, there are a couple of things that you need to remember. First of all we have all felt alone at some time in our life. We have all felt ugly and depressed at times and we have all hated our cars at some time in our life. And we certainly have all hated a job at some time in our life. DUH! Work isnt fun. That's why we get paid to do it! They KNEW we wouldn't like it so they PAY us to do it! If you feel like you are not being treated the right way, remember that people usually treat us the way WE FEEL we DESERVE to be treated. Demand better of yourself for yourself. And no matter what kind of crisis you are going through, there are things to be learned from it. I would not be as gracious to those without money had I not had to struggle with finances at times in my life. I could pick my home apart and find all kinds of fault with it had I not had to live in apartments for years and years. I could feel pretty unimportant being only a "stay at home mom" had I not had to leave my kids for the first few years of their life and go to work. Had I not had the opportunity to watch my baby cry for me as I left him and went to work only to come home to find out that I had missed his first steps and first spoken words. no, I would not enjoy being a stay at mom near as much had I not been given the chance to NOT be a stay at home mom. Challenges in our life shape our character and make us the people that we are. CHARACTER IS HOW WE CHOOSE TO BEHAVE WHEN LIFE DOESN'T GO AS PLANNED. Look for the chance to learn strength building opportunities in your challenges.
ReplyDeleteWow H, you have some truly amazing friends that love you very much! I believe you have more than "one" that loves you unconditionally. (Where is the spell check on this thing?) I don't know who Ja+4 is, but she is absolutely right. We all hate our jobs. Cori is miserable. The reason she is so miserable is the people she works with and all their issues. They are not easy to work with. The only reason I am ok w/my job IS the people I work with...If not for them, I probably wouldn't have lasted. So, add to your list...
ReplyDeleteIt worked...I posted!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDelete(I know you are LYAO).
One more thing, it is fall. I really have a hard time in the fall. I think it is because in January, I anticipate the beginning of the year...Spring comes and finally we can begin. Summer comes and goes in the blink of an eye and here come autumn...the end...The year goes by so quickly...I think I am supposed to be encouraging and uplifting...but it is autumn. Does it help to know you are not alone? We have to rely on each other to get through it all. On my list of blessings, is you...Ü